One thing most Aspies know – sleep does NOT come easy…our brains are constantly plugged into the “grid” so to speak. Add in ADHD and you can well imagine sleep resembles a road riddled with pot holes. Always something in our brains that jolt us awake. Sometimes in a panic over something we forgot or think we did – even something as silly as putting a glass away in the sink after we had a drink before bed, or something as big as locking a door etc. The things that jolt us out of sleep do so with the force of someone shaking us, making it almost impossible to get back to sleep.
What happens after a bad sleep – well morning comes and we are expected to function. We already struggle with processing things – add in a horrible nights sleep and all the is likely to happen is a day of behaviors stemming from the in ability to really process much of anything that is asked of us or expected of us.
I often feel like I could and should write a novel in my head while I sleep – maybe then my brain would be tired. If I am upset at someone I honestly go over in my head in my half asleep half awake state and think of all the things I would love to say to that person and all this pent up anger just follows me into my waking hours. It makes for a crappy next day but it isn’t like I can just switch it off – as I have mentioned before we NEED to work through the feelings in our own way in our own time frame because we process things different than people without Autism. We have more obsessive compulsive tendencies than the typical non spectrum people.
We obsesses over what people say, do and even our own behaviors and our favorite things. We cannot just ever let things go so we can rest. It’s bloody irritating and one of the traits I wish I didn’t have to deal with.
Anyhow it is time for me to try and get some sleep I shall update this a bit more later when my head is less of a fuzzy mess.