Fact versus fiction – the truth about the Spectrum

So many half truths and bold face bs about being on the Spectrum.  Sometimes when I think I have heard it all I am shocked to hear something just ludicrous.  So here are a few things to help shed some light on what is true and what isn’t and some things that JUST need to be said.

For one – we DO NOT all lack empathy – some of us struggle to show it – while others feel so much empathy they get overwhelmed and it’s hard for them to process it all.  Same goes for sympathy we all show it in our own ways – yup you read it right ALL OF US – the human race; show sympathy and empathy in our own ways – however misguided some might be it’s how they process the emotion and deal with it.

We are all dumb and not smart enough to survive.  Ha tell that to the likes of Bill Gates or Steve Jobs, Jim Parsons or Einstein – the list goes on and on…not only did they SURVIVE they thrived and some still are.  Some of the greatest minds this world has ever seen and most of the things we use every day (internet, computers, smart phones etc) are attributed to the likes of a great mind on the spectrum.

We are weird or strange.  Well hey here is a news flash – there is someone out there that thinks the same of you – if not many someones.  Just because what someone else is doing or the way someone has to have things etc is different from yours doesn’t make it weird – just different.  Perhaps the way you dress seems odd to someone else – a man in a business suit would likely be an odd way to dress if you were in the middle of the jungle and wearing what those that live in the jungle in the middle of Winter in North America etc would likely look just as odd.  But that is what life is about – someone’s normal is someone else’s weird – that my friends is how the planet is.

We are not good at things that most “NT” people are.  Well perhaps we wont all be star athletes or the next top model – but so what – not everyone is good at everything but everyone is good at something.  E V E R Y O N E…not just some people have things they totally stink at and other things they rock at…we are no different.

We take so much longer to do things than our NT peers.  Well sure we can often take longer than those without any challenges – but that is what is so cool – we see those challenges, we accept them and we over come them.  When we accomplish something it is a far harder fought battle and thus means so much more.

Autism parents are always celebrating such “stupid” things.  Well here is a news flash if you were told that your kid would never learn to talk, read, write or be able to do much independently and they keep on defying those odds you would likely want to celebrate to.  Our battles are often rougher than most – so our victories are sweeter than most.

Now Autism isn’t an excuse for bad behavior, it’s not an excuse at all – it’s a neurological condition that sets us apart from those without it.  Autism has us – we have Autism – they are one and the same, we cannot keep hiding from the facts even those of us on the Spectrum or Spectrum parents – if we want to raise awareness and acceptance we need to stop hiding from the cold hard facts and start overcoming the stigma one person at a time.

I wish people would stop saying “I may have Autism but Autism doesn’t have me”  about their kids – news flash it DOES have them just as they have it…you can’t have Autism and it not have you – because that isn’t a logical statement it makes it seem like they shouldn’t have any real issues because Autism can’t control them – but it can and does.  It’s always going to have a grip no matter how small or big on a person – I am an Aspie that is 36 and it still rules parts of my life – I have resigned myself to the fact that it is apart of me and it isn’t going to go away so I just have to deal with it.

Another pet peeve “My kid has Autism what’s your kids excuse” – that seems like a cop out for bad behavior – like “oh it is ok because my kid has Autism so that is why they are acting like a self entitled booger but since your kid doesn’t have Autism they are just plain behaving badly.”  That doesn’t fly with me – if my kids are being boogers I will say it – if it is due to over stimulation then I help them through it I don’t let them just keep going and end up hurting another kid because they cannot process what is going on.

Autism cannot be beat it’s not a game to be won…it’s effects will always be there but the key is to minimize it’s impact in ones life and to embrace it and work with it and yourself to find that happy medium.  Autism isn’t something to be feared or disrespected – we are all people to…from all parts of the world, from all kinds of backgrounds and we just want to be seen as such…as a person and see what we can do not always what we can’t.  Just accept us for us…that is all we ask.


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